Luke's last post is nothing but a foul, malicious lie. According to his story, we were slounching about on our haunchy laurels and choosing to be sedentary and lame. According to him, we just didnt feel like getting our hands dirty in the muddy, bug-infested pool of culinary excellence.
The Truth, however, is much more sinister.
You see, if we'd had time to be cooking up a storm, we certainly would have been. If we'd had the opportunity to explore the wonderful world of tasty dishes and exciting possibilities, we'd have been on that like butter on bread. The only problem is, we were busy being KIDNAPPED BY OUTER SPACE ALIENS!!!!!
Here's exactly what went down. We were actually in the kitchen, and brainstorming about our next potential culinary adventure, when I suddenly saw a bright flashing light outside of the window. Lukas was horribly frightened and shivering in the corner like the flimsy yellow coward he is; I, on the other hand, wanted to explore this new development and expand my knowledge on its existence and meaning. After a few promises of Scooby Snacks, he agreed to investigate, quivering like a thing that holds arrows.
The aforementioned flashy bright thingie turned out to be a decently large flying saucer; I would just call it a saucer, because at the time it was most certainly not flying, but to call it simply a "saucer" would seem rather anticlimactic. Anyways, to make a short story even shorter, we were absconded by these aliens (who looked curiously like Zydrunas Ilgauskas, but slightly taller) and were forcibly thrown in the cargo hold. It only took me about 10 minutes to figure out a brilliant escape plan, but due to crazy alien time-bending stuff and some very strange applications of the theory of relativity, it ended up being about a month later when we returned.
Luke tried to cover up the story with his lies of complacency, but I think that you all deserve to know the truth. And you know what the really funny thing is? After Luke made that post, the same thing happened again, and that's why THIS post is very late as well. Aliens... what are ya gonna do, ya know?
That said, I think Luke will have a series of posts quite soon about his amazing Austrian cuisine! Pumped? I am!!
No comments:
Post a Comment